My Exceeding Great Reward

In Genesis 15:1 God is speaking to Abram after he has refused riches from neighboring leaders:

After these things the word of the LORD came unto Abram in a vision, saying, Fear not, Abram: I am thy shield, and thy exceeding great reward

For most of my life, the verse that has really defined me has been Jeremiah 29:11:

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

 

That verse has really defined my life as a Christian. That is the Word that embodies hope and really was the driving force in my support of Rob in starting the Celebrate Recovery ministry at Ocean View Church. I felt God's call on my life so strongly that it confirmed my previous belief that God had claimed my life. I will never forget when Mindy Turner came and gave me a verse:

 

The Spirit of the Lord GOD is upon me; because the LORD hath anointed me to preach good tidings unto the meek; he hath sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives, and the opening of the prison to them that are bound;

 

These are the verses through which I attempted to filter all that I did. From full time ministry as Pastor's secretary to administrative assistant, cheerleader, and Prayer warrior for Celebrate Recovery. I was very busy but I was full of the Holy Spirit and overflowing on all that was around me.

 

There were issues, which became glaringly apparent with the implosion of my marriage and my rocky mental state. Rob left at 9:00pm on September 30th to start a new life across the country. It has taken the past 2 1/2 years to understand who I was as an individual, as a mother, as a friend. My life had ALWAYS been defined by who I was when I was with someone else. 

 

My lifelong battle with addictive behaviors has really ruled over me. Last night, while sitting in an Optifast meeting, God declared himself to me, "I am thy shield, and thy exceeding great reward." Food is NOT my reward. The praise of man is NOT my reward. I have yet to even have the tiniest inkling of what this will really mean as each day comes, but I am content, and excited by the hope for the future.