Another Hard Day

This was a tough one. More obsessing over food. More depression... It is funny how this feels like punishment. My head knows that it is good and that it will save my health. That I want to look good again. Feel good again. I have been physically better than in a long time. No headaches and the pain in my body has been less intense. So I know this is good. My will and emotion are a mess. Thinking of all of the food that I am missing. I know that food is a momentary pleasure and that this battle for my health will last a lifetime. If I don't get healthier I may have to give up my dream of serving as a missionary in Ukraine. The 20 months of Russian lessons all for naught. So I am not giving up. I will struggle on. I fed on God's word today. It calmed me for a little while, but the mind wins out often.